“Tell me the facts and I’ll learn. Tell me the truth and I’ll believe. But tell me a story and it will live in my heart forever.” 

(Native American Proverb of unknown origin)

The Power of Storytelling

I come from several storytelling traditions. My brothers and I didn’t know that growing up. Both our mother’s and our father’s families had cut off from their family stories to avoid annihilation. (They never told us or our parents.) And yet, my mother was a storyteller. She fostered a love of story in us and in our children. Professionally, both of my brothers and I now use storytelling regularly to teach, to empower and to carry history forward, just like our hidden ancestors did for thousands of years.

Psychiatrist, Neurologist and Lakota-Cherokee descendent, Lewis Mehl-Madrona, defines “healing” (as opposed to “cure,”) as being reconciled to community and to self. Storytelling in both Lakota and Cherokee traditions does exactly that. Stories remind us of what is true, support that healthy story of who we are, and remind us that we belong to something greater than just ourselves. 

Re-Pair

Some of the stories are life lessons. Those are used to correct our behaviors when they threaten the health of the community or our connectedness to it. Those stories write and rewrite the version of who we are, according to the values of the community. They also convey culture and often history as well. 

In Native American understanding, history is not the story of dead people filed into categories. When those who have passed are remembered, in story, in song or even in thoughts, those ancestors live on in a new way. They are present with us now in this way, as we tell HISStory, or HERstory or THEIRStory. We have the opportunity to see ourselves in them and them in ourselves. Our personal story is part of a much bigger, more fascinating and important story.

The stories literally re-pair our broken parts. When we need healing, we have been split off from who we really are and how we fit into the grand scheme of things, the stories, and sharing the stories together, help to “re,” “pair” the connection that was once broken. We are healed in this way. 

Brains, Too

Social belonging, as mentioned in many previous blogs, literally “repairs” the circuits in our prefrontal cortices. Those are the Executive Function centers responsible for error correction, problem solving, prioritization and social connection. Is it any wonder that so many people who struggle with navigating a neurospicy mind in a neurobland world sometimes take so many hits to our social connectedness? When we belong in community, we heal psychologically, emotionally and physically. We are accepted. We can celebrate and be celebrated. The stories remind us that we belong.

Stories and Community

We live in a time where we can try on different stories and form our preferred story countless different ways. In addition to oral and written stories, fiction and nonfiction, music, visual art, dance, and theater we now have radio, podcasts, film, television, video, social media posts, blogs, vlogs, and even both online and in person, role-playing games, video games, and the various special interest conventions like Comic Con, GenCon and the like. 

These are places of potential re-pair. These are places where we can heal and be part of the healing for others. We are connected to community in some form or fashion through each of these storytelling venues. 

Some are active connections where we try on different parts of ourselves. Others are similar to the self-hypnosis that I described in the first blog in this series, where we “try on” the energy of another person. All are opportunities to live inside a different iteration of our story. In these spaces we choose what does not belong to us, while also finding out where we do and do not belong with others.

The Way Forward

Our story is being perpetually written and rewritten. When we let them, the stories hand us ourselves and heal us. When we share stories with one another and listen carefully with all three of our brains, we connect emotionally, physiologically and psychologically. We can heal in all three of those domains as we connect through “story” in whatever form it takes.

Empathy

What are the ways you share your story? You might find yourself updating your version of your story as others “bear witness” to it. As I explained in the first blog of this series, that’s the stuff of healing! How can you be more intentional about “bearing witness” to other people’s stories? Let’s connect in the spaces in between the words, in the “vv” and co-create something healthier and better for everyone.

What are the stories you’ve carried about yourself? Are they serving you? If you’d like help reshaping the stories that have formed your sense of yourself, Contact Tiffany today. Let’s write a more effective version.